forgive and forget: Idiom Meaning and Origin

What does ‘forgive and forget’ mean?

Forgive and forget: A phrase that encourages letting go of past grievances and not holding grudges against others.

Idiom Explorer

Releasing Emotional Baggage

The idiom "forgive and forget" is a commonly used phrase in the English language. It is known and understood by native speakers in the United States. The phrase consists of two verbs, "forgive" and "forget", which have separate meanings but take on a distinct connotation when used together.

When someone says "forgive and forget", they imply that you should not only forgive someone who has wronged you but also completely forget about the wrongdoing. In other words, you should let go of any negative feelings or grudges and move on as if the incident never happened.

This idiom emphasizes the importance of forgiveness and the desire to move forward without dwelling on past grievances. It suggests that holding onto anger or resentment is counterproductive and can hinder personal growth and relationships.

The idiom "forgive and forget" is related to the idiom "let bygones be bygones". This phrase also encourages letting go of past grievances and moving forward without holding onto resentment. The idiom "forget you" is similar, as it promotes getting rid of negative emotions and not allowing someone who has wronged you to continue to have power over you.

The idiom "let off" is another phrase that has a similar meaning. It means to release or relieve someone from blame or punishment. When you forgive someone, you are essentially letting them off the hook and not holding their past actions against them.

Forgiveness allows for reconciliation and forgetting painful memories.

The idiom "hold a grudge" is the opposite of "forgive and forget". It means to continue to feel angry or resentful towards someone for a past offense. "Forgive and forget" encourages letting go of grudges and not holding onto negative emotions.

The phrase "let go and let God" is another related idiom. It suggests that you should surrender your worries or grievances to a higher power and trust that things will work out. This can be seen as a form of forgiveness and letting go of control.

The origin of the idiom "forgive and forget" can be traced back to ancient writings, including the Bible. Similar sentiments about forgiveness and letting go of the past can be found in various religious texts and philosophical teachings. However, the specific phrase "forgive and forget" became popularized in the English language during the 16th century.

The idiom's popularity can be attributed to its succinctness and universal applicability. It resonates with people from diverse backgrounds and cultures, as the concept of forgiveness is universally valued. The idiom encapsulates the idea that forgiveness should extend beyond words and should also encompass a willingness to erase the memory of the offense.

While the idiom suggests a noble sentiment, it is often debated whether the notion of "forgiving and forgetting" is truly attainable or even desirable in certain situations. Some argue that it is unrealistic to expect individuals to completely erase traumatic or deeply hurtful experiences from their memory. Others contend that forgiveness should be a gradual process that does not necessarily require forgetting.

Despite these debates, the idiom "forgive and forget" continues to be widely used in everyday conversation as well as in popular culture. It serves as a reminder of the power of forgiveness and the potential for personal growth that comes from letting go of past grievances. Whether it is achievable in its literal sense or not, the idiom remains a symbol of our collective desire to move forward and find resolution in our relationships and personal lives.

Example usage

Examples of how the idiom forgive and forget can be used in a sentence:

  1. After their argument, Kate decided to forgive and forget, and she continued to be friends with Emily.
  2. John apologized for his mistake, and his boss was willing to forgive and forget, giving him a second chance.
  3. Even though Susan was hurt by her sister's words, she knew it was important to forgive and forget in order to maintain a healthy relationship.

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